J. Palmer

There are many things that can cause me to feel mildly depressed at times; more frequently than not, it’s somehow “project” related.

I have so many different “projects” that I want to tackle, or goals to achieve; and so many of these silly goals and projects seem to be within my grasp, so easily attainable, close to completion, and so on. Yet, I’m still so very far from getting there. It’s frustrating. Depressing.

I have three cars in the yard or barn, awaiting my time, parts, and some tinkering before they can hit the road again; a Durango with transmission issues, a Sebring with engine issues, and a Cherokee with–well, it’s an old XJ, so, enough said.

I have a barn in disarray, filled with junk and scrap, begging for me to clean and organize it all.

I have a “workshop” of electronics needing repair and organization; a shack full of radio gear that collects dust instead of listening in on and making contact with the world.

I have computer and gaming systems in various states of repair and operability; many needing a controller, a power supply, a drive, or whatever.

I have so many things that I want or need to do with all of these fine toys, hobbies and interests; but so many times I find I’m lacking the ways, means, time, money to do anything more than give a passing glance and sigh,”someday.”

So, once again, I’m here to say that I am going to make an attempt at keeping a better diary. I kind of doubt that I will, based on my history of failed attempts, but I’m going to try.

Already, my head hurts. Odd swelling and swirling pressure circling through my cranium as I stare at this screen, trying to figure out what I might actually have that’s worth tapping out on the keyboard. Other than the struggle of finding time, the struggle of finding words and thoughts to share is perhaps one of the bigger problems I have in keeping a diary.

I don’t know what to say.

And now, the overwhelming feeling of lost confusion is driving me away from the keyboard. I think I’m going to go find a bite to eat and maybe a video or something to watch. Maybe I’ll get some motivation to write something after that.